Day 4

OK. I thought I was done for the night. I was sitting here crying and decided to analyze why I was crying. I mean for real. If I was with George right now all we would be doing it drinking, he would be farting, feeling me up, etc. Nothing special. Nothing that I should really miss. So why am I crying? Really? Yes, I miss him. But, Jamie...this is the right thing for you. It is. I need to be happy that Debbie knows we aren't coming. Because now I know I won't be getting a phone call from him. I know that. And I need to be happy. I asked God to watch out for me and that's exactly what He is doing. If I continue to sit here and cry and mope the devil is just going to come in. I am not saying that I won't allow myself weak moments. But they need to be just that moments. That's it. This is the best thing for me. It is. I know I will come out of it much better.